Breakups can be emotionally and mentally painful, especially when we have given all of us to someone else. All this continuous process of feeling love for someone occurs almost the same way we develop a drug addiction - if we end the addiction abruptly, it can be extremely painful. A breakup can hurt as much as grieving the passing of someone you love.
Though at first you might feel helpless, make sure you get some rest and have a good night sleep to assist with the process of moving on from your relationship. This process is often long and can affect your mental health. Therefore, don't be afraid to ask your friends and family for help during this difficult time. Plus it might help for you to have someone to talk to, as it can help to clarify your thoughts and emotions.
Getting Over a Breakup: The First Days
The first days after a breakup are the most difficult. You feel like your mental health is going downhill, you doubt yourself and you'll likely feel reckless. If you and your ex agreed to stop any form of contact between the two, you might still feel tempted to reach out. This is totally understandable as you used to have such a special connection.
However, focus on the present and try not to think too much about the past. Live in the moment, rest well and try to spend some time with your loved ones, as the first days after the breakup can be tough.
Maybe do things you enjoy doing, like listening to music and watching films. Another good piece of advice is not to feel guilty. When we're hurt, sometimes we not only feel angry but also guilty, but these feelings can worsen even more our state of mind.
To help you better cope with a breakup read below our top 5 tips to get over your ex boyfriend or girlfriend. By the end of this post, you will understand that the main key to move on quickly is to be strong-minded.
Top 5 Things to Do to Get Over Someone
1. Go back to the dating scene
It might sound like a bad idea, but it's one of the best things you can do to move on quickly. Most psychologists agree that joining the dating scene after a breakup can be very helpful. Why? It is exciting to meet new people and chat with different people and in the medium term you will realize that there are people out there much better than your ex.
At first, you might find it a bad idea and you'll have negative thoughts such as "this person is not my type" or "this person is just not as nice as my ex" but you will soon understand that there are many people out there who are better and will care more for you.
2. Be selfish
During a long time you cared so much for someone to the point of putting that person first than you and above you. Love made you blind and all your love and support were focused on someone who didn't deserve your caring. Now it is time to be selfish and to love yourself. Focus on yourself and your goals and try to be the best version of yourself you can be. It is time to love yourself and to be selfish - being selfish is not always bad.
3. Set up professional goals and focus on your professional life
There's no better way to move on than to set up new goals, especially professional goals. Now it is the right time to think about you and what's best for your life. Think about all the things you want to achieve in your life and motivate yourself to start working NOW to achieve your goals. By the time you're closer to achieve your goals, you'll realize that time flew by and yet you've fully moved on from your breakup, you have achieved a lot in your life and possibly found someone better!
4. Spend more time with your friends and family
When you go through a breakup, you tend to isolate yourself from your friends and family because you're in a sad state of mind. However, that is the last thing you should do. Force yourself to spend more time with the people who make you laugh. Spend more time with the people you love. In the first few days, it will be a bit difficult to distract your thoughts from your ex, but as time passes by you'll feel better and better - keep your mind positive at all times and enjoy moments with your friends and family.
5. Be rational, logical and strong-minded
We all have an emotional side and a rational side. Some people are 50%-50%, others are more emotional than rational, and some people are more rational than emotional. It tends to be more difficult to move on for people who are more emotional than rational. But especially in this hard time, you need to try hard to prioritize your rational side and think about all the logical reasons why that person was not the right person for you as well as all the reasons why this relationship wouldn't work sooner or later. It is a good mental exercise to write down all these reasons and every time you're feeling down because of the breakup you can look at the list.
A key aspect for you to be able to move on as quickly as possible is to be strong-minded. All the previous points of this list require you to have mental power to change your feelings and your negative state of mind. As we discussed previously, this is the time for you to be rational, selfish and focus on you and your goals. To do all of this you need extra mental power. You need to force yourself to be positive and strong-minded - it is difficult at first but it is very much worth it!
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